10 Vain Things Lockdown Made Me Realise

Dear Diary,

Lockdown has us all reflecting on our lives, our self-image, our present and our future and not all of these reflections are positive (or even remotely appealing) but here we are, stuck in our minds (and within the 4 walls) reflecting as if we've just smoked a spliff round a fire pit with our pals tbh. Lockdown has made me realise a lot about my own vanity and self-image and here I am, baring my soul to the world about how much of a vain b*tch I really am! I'm sure people can relate to this so huns, here are the 10 Vain things lockdown has made me realise about myself and my life both good and bad- Enjoy! x

1) No amount of root spray can make you accept you are going grey at 25.

Like seriously, no words for it.

I was always aware when going for my in-between root touch up appointments that I had a little bit of grey on my middle pattern but after going so long without my roots being done, I am in fact a whole lot of grey up there. My boyfriend would be like “you aren’t even grey I can’t see it” like duh, I spray my root spray on before you even get a chance to see the granny lurking inside me, boo! Honestly awful, Feel like a cougar with my greys (there’s only a 2yr age gap calm down) I have overall embraced a more natural look on lockdown but I will be damned if anyone tries to make me embrace going grey at 25! And if you come @ me about it remember, you could be bringing unwanted stress that may possibly contribute to my grey hair and that is not cool babe xo

2) That body hair grows too fast, I think I’m a legit descendant of wolves.

OK, call me out if I am wrong, but for all of you who are still shaving (ngl, I gave it up for a few weeks at the start myself) have you found that hair seems to grow way quicker now or is it just me?? Like armpit and leg hair, within 3 days I’ve skipped hedgehog and went straight to a hamster?! It has given me total fear thinking of all the times I may have thought I was okay, lifting weights in the gym and people were getting a furry surprise under my arms and I didn't know. Disguuuuusting.

3) Beauty treatments you would go into your overdraft for, can actually be done at home.

That dermaplanning you pay lots for? Veet Sensitive eyebrow shaper does the job, goes by batteries and takes off all that fuzz on your face and dead skin around acne. Put some Kiel’s midnight recovery oil on straight after and your skin will look amazing the next day! I have been doing this fortnightly due to my cystic acne and it’s definitely improved my skin.

HENNA BROWS- I pay £25 per month for this and sure, I get my brows waxed and shaped when I’m there however, I couldn’t accept going about with non- existent brows the whole of lockdown, I just was not okay with that reality. I purchased a henna brow kit that cost me around £56 all in. Since I have now used this kit 4 times, I have saved about £40-50 by doing it at home and there is still tonnes of henna left in the pot for months to come, buzzing!

HAIR- now we are all quick to go get our roots touched up, even though our ombre or balyage still looks amazing… so why not buy a £10 root spray instead? There are loads out there to choose from (trust me lol, I’ve experimented quite a bit being grey and all if you didn’t know already) and would result in you being able to hold off getting your roots done for a few weeks and enable you to save for it as well!

4) To never take having a reason to wash my hair for granted again.

Who knew washing your hair was such a chore, right? But better yet, who knew we mostly feel we needed a reason TO wash it! I’m making a lot of “well I am not going anywhere so I can go without washing it today” and “well I exercise tomorrow so I may as well wait until then” excuses because, I just can’t be bothered! Dry shampoo has long been a solid friendship of mines that I hold so, so dearly but on lockdown? It’s turned into a bit of a love story ngl.

5) That my online shopping habit is very much still present even when I have nowhere to go.

Ugh. This was the one I was hoping would just die down but no sir, there she is, still going strong and squaring up to my bank balance.

Why am I buying so much?? I’m not even going anywhere! I’m guilty of “just incase” buying you know, incase I don’t see something like it when lockdown is over or my size is no longer available. It’s so hard as well to avoid because online retailers are still releasing new clothes and out with the old, in with the new so you feel you do have to buy items you like “incase” they are replaceable. Lets not talk about the fact online retailers are being extremely seductive with their emails and luring us in with their too good to resist discount codes! I mean, forgive me father for I have sinned and all that but, can anyone really blame us for online shopping rn?? Idk.

6) That I could probably do a more “snatchural” look more often.

I mean, this will probably last a week once lockdown is fully lifted but it’s been nice doing a more natural look and not actually hating what I see.

It’s great to just get up and go quicker (exclusive report: ya gals doing a snatched look in under 10 minutes now!) and I actually feel quite put together despite the minimum effort. With acne, I am always conscious to not clog up my skin too much day to day and I seem to have found the perfect mix that is simple, not time consuming, looks good and feels good on my skin- I have even received lots of compliments about how fresh I look these days, even off of my overly critical, typical Scottish mum (totally didn’t even try to look decent… lol xo)

7) To actually breathe and not throw a tantrum when my lash isn’t sticking and my hair won’t curl.

I have mastered how to release my inner zen master when it comes to doing my face girls.

We have all been there. When your lash won’t stick for the third time. Your brows are uneven or like slugs. One of your eyes' winged liner looks perfect and the others too thick and you struggle to keep your sh*t together, tbh. You may throw a brush down in anger. You may let out a mini scream of frustration. You may even go full blown “that’s it I’m not going out, I’m done” – we have all been there in one way or another! But with lockdown, I’ve been able to practice and do my make-up with mostly no time restraints. Nobody is waiting on me and even when the only people who were – my boyfriend and the take-away guy – I held it together really well. I reached into my inner zen, I breathed deeply, reminded myself I’m a boss b*tch and carried on and, by some kind of Christmas (but its totally summer lol xo) miracle- I’m even getting a full face on quicker than ever before?? Who would have thought, eh? Bringing the shock factor to your Wednesday huns x

8) That even whilst in lockdown my make-up still all runs out at once.

Why does this always happen?? You could religiously check how much is left in all your go-to products to prepare to buy them and yet they all suddenly run out at once!! And why is it always the expensive products too? Hi £50. Goodbye £50, you are being donated to a charity case that is infact- MY LIFE xo

Like seriously though girls, how does this happen?? And in lockdown too! This confirms it, we are never truly safe from our spending habits EVER.

9) Why do I buy clothes that just hurt me without my consent?

Jeans, leggings, bra tops… they are all repeat offenders for leaving red marks on your waist/belly where they have punished you for eating more at the buffet than you should have. Sure, these clothes may look good on… if you are planning on not eating or sitting down for the whole day!

Buying the smaller size may be good in a photo for the gram, but can you breathe tho?? I have gained a few “lockdown pounds” and we ain’t talking cash just because they only accepting card. I admittedly, despite all my best efforts, have gained a few lbs. Some muscle and some… the empty bars of a Terry’s Chocolate Orange speak for me ok, and when it comes to putting on these insta-worthy clothes? I am genuinely not surprised I am asthmatic tbh. Nurses should check your peep flow with your button done and then undone because my breathing within each tells a different story, FACT.

Definitely when I can, I am going to size up because it’s not worth the pain and that panic when you go to the toilet after food and you aren’t sure if your jeans are going to button back up and you aren't with your mates to help get you out of this one. Dramatic AF.

10) To never let anyone, judge my PJ addiction again, I was clearly prepping for a pandemic guys.

Yes dearest friends, who’s laughing now??

All those years of stocking up on Primark’s finest and everyone judged me saying I have an obsession and I don’t need so many PJ’s… comfort level during lockdown: 100.

My PJ addiction – and fully stocked drawer of PJ’s – has got me through lockdown safely and comfortably and, whilst everyone was out panic buying loungewear and nightwear for double the price, I was sitting in my trusty Primark (that was now closed) PJ’s with zero drama!

And there we have it folks! 10 vain things I've realised in lockdown. I hope you have enjoyed reading this, let me know in the comments if you relate to this as well, it surely can't just be me??

Stay Safe & Forever vain!

Much Love,